So many ups and downs. So many mood swings. So many tears. So many days of not knowing the f*ck is wrong with me. Black and blue days intertwined with euphoric ones when I feel on top of my game and like I could do it all. Days when I get to work and tears silently stroll down my cheeks. Today is one of those days where I cried in front of my screen and pondered where all the wonders of life have gone while avoiding actually working. Instead, I dive into the past to seek understanding and answers. Back in 2017, when I visited the psychiatric ward for a couple of weeks while having a massive anxiety attack that lasted for days, I met with a psychiatrist who diagnosed a Cluster B and C mixed personality disorder: borderline, avoidant, and somewhat, narcissistic. Mixed personality disorder is one of the most commonly diagnosed personality disorders. In one study looking at patients referred for psychotherapy, 18.4% met the diagnostic criteria for a mixed personality disorder. (1) I n...